Why? Because My Wife Wanted It?

I must admit most of the opposition I get to my decision to reverse my vasectomy and let God decide the size of our family is that I let my wife nag/push/force me into it. That I did it just because she wanted it. Um, no. Let me clarify that a little. It is true that she was the first to realize the proper direction and to bring it up to me on many occasions. That just means that she was first to be right. It is true that her passion in this direction far preceded my own belief that this was even the correct direction. Does that mean I caved and let her have her way because I am weak or was sick of hearing her talk about it? Absolutely not.

Even when I finally decided to do this, I was not completely on board with the idea of it all because I refused to pray about it or research the scriptures on it. I did not WANT to believe it was right because it was uncomfortable and difficult and I didn't want that. When I decided to do this it was with the idea that I am commanded by God to love my wife and give myself up for her as Christ did the church (Ephesians 5:25). If this is what it takes to do that, then I can do that. I also want to be very clear that I now believe that she was right all along and I was dense. More on that later.

If you are the wife of a man who feels he is done with the "having kids" thing and he wants to not have more kids (blessings) and get a vasectomy... if you are at the point where you feel that you do not want to "nag" him into doing it because of you... I urge you not to give in. That does not mean you have to nag or push or fight about it. Prayer does bring miracles, I am proof of that. I am hardheaded and my wife stopped pushing and started praying and even got a couple of her friends to pray about it, also. Well, it worked as God changed my heart. It was a strange path it took to get here now, but it was what it took to teach me the lessons I had to learn. I originally did this for my wife. There's nothing wrong with that at all. I ultimately came to believe she was right, even if I wasn't there in the beginning.

As far as my belief that it is right... There are so many places in scripture where it talks about children being a blessing, God controlling the womb (opening it and closing it), having faith that God knows best, that many children are a blessing. Oh, but that is a different time and a different culture, right? God is unchanging, my friends. I don't think he cares much for our culture anyway. There are also many places in scripture where people make their own choices, that they feel are correct and good but are based on their own knowledge. But each decision that they made, it turned out, was against the will of God, and those choices led to so many bad ends. Adam and Eve, Abraham and Sarah, Cain, Saul, the nation of Israel... and that is just in the first few books of the Bible.

I have asked many times for someone to find me ONE scripture reference that says it is ok for me to be in control of the size of my family. Just one. Or hey, how about a scripture reference that says that I have the common sense to make any decision on my own. If we had any sense, we would make sure our lives were mirroring scripture. I can find a lot of scripture that says it is up to God but have never seen one or been shown one that says it can be up to me. Shouldn't that be enough?